Abundance, Redundance and Dumb-Dunces.
The Picture of Dorian Dumb, Dumber and Dumbest
Behold the fossilized shit sandwich of Democratic party gatekeepers still throne-squatting at Corporate Numbnutz News.
Anderson Cooper with his trademark perpetually confused expression, flanked by human Valium Rham Emanuel on one side. And on the other, the half-embalmed mummy of James Carville squinting his endorsement for Rham’s future presidential ambitions.
Both providing no useful information regarding getting rid of Trump’s 2nd Reich other than Hey, wait and see. Good candidates will appear. Don’t sweat it. Oh, and progressives like Zohran Mamdani are “far left” extremists with “esoteric positions” like affordable food, housing, healthcare.
You know, kinda like FDR Lite. The same platform that defined the Democrat Party’s most popular and successful president. Oh, and Mamdani also wants to defund genocide. Weird, esoteric, extremist shit like that.
The only thing missing from this crap grinder was a side of Chuck Schumer blaming Donald Trump on “average working families who didn’t realize how much we had done and how much we care for them.”
Is all this a fair reaction to the uninspiring, eons-late tip offered from head bipartisan-stinkpot sellout Barack Obama? That Democrats actually fight for the people they completely cut off decades ago?
“You want to deliver for people and make their lives better? You got to figure out how to do it,” Obama said.
Yes, Obama briefly left his estimated $135 million net worth and 7,000 square-foot Martha’s Vineyard compound to sing these lyrics to a tone-deaf private DNC fundraiser that raised… $2.5 million! If that’s not the peak illustration of what’s brain dead about the Democratic party I don’t know what is.
This came from the President of The United Party of Bad Precedents. Precedents like gutting Habeas corpus, killing single-payer during a super majority, making Bush’s tax cuts for the rich permanent and offering up Social Security and Medicare on a platter to please the Tea Party. All important things “average working families” maybe DID realize their party had done and were fucking fed up with it.
Mind you, Obama wasn’t suggesting Democrats actually *fight* for abandoned voters. Because for Democrats to do that, they’d have to abandon most of their Democratic politicians. Let’s go to a relevant poll:
Democrats have a 63% disapproval rating.
Possible solution? Come up with a new name.
And add Retsyn or something to distract from a Terminally Shitty Product™. Do anything but change. Naomi Lachance added this:
“Democrats’ overall favorability has only dropped since Trump took office.” -Naomi Lachance, Rolling Stone
So basically the worse Trump gets… the more unpopular Democrats get. Who’d-a thunk it? You mean when you lose to Nazis and don't fight Nazis like they’re actual Nazis…people get pissed? Inconceivable!
So to the rescue comes Superbama! Offering up another lukewarm bowl of soggy, namby-pamby wishy-washy milquetoast gibberish:
“There’s been, I gather, some argument between the left of the party and people who are promoting the quote-unquote abundance agenda. Listen, those things are not contradictory.” - Previous Deporter In Chief
Get it? There’s good people on both sides of the “no one should be forgotten” vs “only the rich should get food and access to higher elevations before the floods hit” issue. He’s the man. The “abundance agenda” and helping people are compatible. As long as the people being helped are the ones who’ve helped themselves to everyone else’s happiness.
AARON REGUNBERG states in his article: “Why the ‘Abundance Agenda’ Could Sink the Democratic Party” in The Nation:
“And they have found in abundance advocates—like Abundance coauthor Derek Thompson, who recently argued that oligarchy ‘does a terrible job of describing today’s problems’—a valuable tool for redirecting the anti-establishment rage building within the Democratic base away from themselves and toward a new set of scapegoats: bureaucracy, leftists, and what Thompson and his coauthor Ezra Klein call ‘everything bagel liberalism.’”
“The Abundance Agenda” - Meaning: Don’t pay attention to those Fascist oligarch genociders behind the curtain raping the environment, killing kids, and robbing what’s left of your humanity.
To repeat: on January 6, Master of the Senate Chuck Schumer rationalized losing what should’ve been the easiest election in history by scapegoating “average working families who didn’t realize how much we had done and how much we care for them.”
So naturally, after months of empathically processing the universal needs of the average working family, Chuck announced his grand strategy for appealing to the party’s FDR New Deal roots:
By remaining the biggest asset Donald Trump and his Nazi Hate goons have in their quest to hurt our population, destroy what’s left of the NIH and the economy, piss off the world, and commit genocide in Gaza.
However…Look, Another Poll With 4 Points of HOPE™!
A new July poll by Verasight (Yeah I never heard of them either. I grew up with Gallup and Arbitron where they’d give you five bucks and you’d wait until the end of the week to PHYSICALLY use a pencil to write in a paper diary the TV shows you lied about watching the week before because your black and white TV was broken.
Anyway, this new poll has New Hope With Retsyn. And added data properly topline documented, processed and interpreted, whatever the fuck that means (I don’t know because I probably copied it wrong) by one G. ELLIOTT MORRIS of Strength In Numbers. I never heard of him either. But his resume reads like Mr. Robot so I trust his work. Remember, I’m an Arbitron baby.
This new Strength In Numbers/Verasight poll shows Democrats leading Republicans on a generic House ballot by…….. FOUR POINTS!
WOW!
Take THAT, existential threat Republicans! Your days are numbered.
Until the next poll.
For entrancing collage art and disturbing satirical vocal interpretations of horrible politicians, subscribe to Martha Previte! This time Senator Susan Collins of Maine is very disappointed about getting asked questions.
You might also like my Substack collection of mocking obituaries. Find a shovel and dig into Stephen Miller’s Future Obituary.
And buy my disturbing book of mocking obituaries by clicking on this evil link:
They took “trickle-down” and ground off the serial number, then gave it a fresh coat of paint. Voila: “Abundance!”
Both are based on what I like to call the Hog Slop Theory of Economics. If you let rich people gorge themselves at the public trough, what slops out of the trough will somehow be enough for the rest of us.
Spot on!